Posted by Men Secrets on Jan 21, 2009 in
Dating Are you interested in Latin women? Dating a Latina requires you to develop a certain cultural sensitivity.
First of all, you should realize that the world south of the American border is a very big place. A woman from Brazil is likely to have different cultural traditions than a woman of Mexican heritage.
Think about it from a European standpoint. Europe is much smaller geographically from Latin America, but the regional differences are stark. You would expect a woman from Russia to have different expectations than a woman from Italy, who in turn would be different from a British woman. Latin America is no different.
Get to know Latin American culture, geography and politics. Know the difference between Uruguay and Paraguay. It also helps if you make an attempt to learn Spanish or Portuguese.
But, don’t think that every Latina speaks the same kind of Spanish. In Mexico, a burrito is a food with beans and rice. In Argentina, it is a little donkey.
If you are interested in Latin women, dating customs may be somewhat different. Latin women are, by and large, Catholic, and may be more traditional and conservative than their white counterparts.
Latin women dating are more likely to take their Catholic faith seriously than white Catholic women. That means, they take the Vatican’s dictates about birth control and other sexual matters quite seriously.
If you are dating a Latina woman, you need to put on your dancing shoes. The Latin American culture is very open to all kinds of dancing, and she will expect you to be able to tear up the floor.
Latin culture is very romantic. You will be expected to romance the Latin woman you are dating. Bring her flowers, pepper her with endearments, and wine and dine her. Put some effort into the relationship and she will reciprocate.
Latinas place strong emphasis on their families. It is not unusual for your girlfriend to be closer to a second cousin than you are to your brother. The extended family has strong roots in the Latin culture, so you will need to expand what your definition of family is.
A Latina may also have more traditional ideas than her white sisters about what men and women’s roles in the family are. They have been raised in a macho culture. Even if they say they want to break this mold, many Latin women dating white men subconsciously expect their dates to fall into this pattern.
If you are with a Latin woman, dating leads to courtship, and courtship leads to marriage. The courtship of a Latin woman involves paying attention to many traditional norms. For instance, a woman of Mexican heritage may expect her man to walk on the street side of the sidewalk when escorting her in order to protect her from the traffic. As you get to know your Latina girlfriend, you will learn the types of things she expects from you.
If you are going to pursue Latin women, dating becomes a multicultural experience. Embrace the richness and variety of the Latin American culture.
Tags: Latin Women
Posted by Men Secrets on Jan 20, 2009 in
Relationships How to Get Over Someone You Love – A Heartbreak Healing Guide
Do you know how to get over someone you love? If you have had a deep, meaningful experience with a partner and the relationship goes sour, you may not know how to get over someone you love.
At first, you will feel terribly hurt and alone. Accept your pain – don’t fight it. You spent a good amount of time and emotional energy on your ex, and that won’t heal in a hurry. It is okay to cry. Talk to your friends and family about how they dealt with a break up.
One useful thing to do at this stage is to write a letter to your ex. Pour out everything that is in your heart. Talk about your love, your expectations, and your pain. Many people find that this letter runs pages in length. Take your time composing it.
Then, when you have said everything that needs saying, roll up the letter and burn it.
That’s right. What ever you do, do not mail this letter to your ex. The purpose of the letter was for you to emote. But, don’t keep the letter lying around either. You want a symbolic ending. Burning gives you a sense of finality that even throwing the letter away won’t give you.
As you get a little bit of perspective on the relationship, the next step in how to get over someone you love is to analyze what went wrong. As unlikely as it seems right now, you will have other relationships. If you learn from the mistakes in this one, the next one has a better chance of success.
Keep your distance from your ex. That will help you in how to get over someone you love. As soon after the break up as possible, exchange any property you have of each others, and then do a complete separation for 30 days. Agree that you won’t call, text, or email each other for a month. This will give you time to recover from the break up.
Use this time to work on areas of your own life that you have neglected. If you have ignored friends because your romantic relationship took up too much time, use this period in your life to reconnect. Friends can provide a valuable support network during this time.
Start working on your own emotional and physical health during this time. Take time to go to the gym and consider getting therapy to help your psyche heal.
You should also look into ways to improve yourself. Join a hiking club. Take a class at the local community center. Take tango lessons. As you work on becoming a better person, the hurt of the relationship will begin to fade away.
You will meet a whole new circle of people when you get involved in activities you enjoy. Some of these people will become friends. And, one may become a soul mate.
And isn’t forming a new relationship the ultimate answer to the question “how to get over someone you love?”
Tags: get over someone you love, Heartbreak
Posted by Men Secrets on Jan 19, 2009 in
Personal Development,
Relationships It can be difficult to show people how much they mean to you. Many of us go through life with strong feelings about the people in our lives but we never express those emotions clearly. Yet, having meaningful relationships actually requires that we know how to show our love and affection.
Learning How to Communicate With Your Partner
Showing your emotions can be easier when you give yourself permission to start sharing how you feel with the people around you.
You can start small – laughing when you want to laugh, hugging someone when you want to hug, or holding hands when you want to be close to the other person.
It’s a good idea to start slow in order to build a strong foundation built on trust and respect. Without building trust and respect, you can’t feel comfortable to share your love or deepest thoughts.
* If you didn’t grow up in a family where these skills were encouraged, give yourself some time to get used to communicating and emoting.
If you have practiced this first step but still have a hard time showing love and communicating confidently, you may want to consider trying positive affirmations about communication and relationships. Affirmations are statements you can use to change the way you think and behave.
Another way to look at it is that affirmations are positive statements that activate your mind to accomplish great things. If you tell yourself each day, “Communicating my feelings is important,” for example, you give yourself permission to communicate how you feel about others.
Another affirmation that gives you permission to show your love and affection for others is: “Communication is the master key that I use to open the door to happiness.”
* Words have power. You can harness the power of words to change your life and relationships in a positive manner.
You can learn how to show love and communicate with loved ones by actively using affirmations in your life. Affirmations can help you give yourself permission to share your feelings and love. This will allow you to experience much more fulfilling and positive relationships.
* Affirmations can also help you reprogram your mind with positive thoughts. Use these thoughts to focus on – and achieve – your goals and replace negative thoughts.
Even though affirmations take some practice and may take some time before you begin to feel the full effect, you can make drastic changes to your behavior by repeating affirmations that encapsulate your belief system. Repeat and reflect on them every day and you’ll soon notice a difference.
Yes! Affirmations really can make a difference in your life and the lives of others. How? Well, what you think affects how you feel, which affects what you do with your life. The more positive you think and feel about yourself and your relationships, the more positive events and situations you’ll experience in that relationship.
These changes will not only be obvious to you, but also to your friends and family. If you make these affirmations part of your daily life, you’ll find that expressing love and communicating your feelings will be easier. You’ll also be happy to discover that the love you express will be returned to you!
Posted by Men Secrets on Jan 19, 2009 in
Relationships Help save marriage from the secular therapists who call themselves “Marriage and Family Counselors.” These professionals, who generally have a master’s degree in psychology have a misleading license. You would think from their titles that they are specialists to help save marriage, but when you find out what they are really trained in, you see that it is in individual therapy.
Look at the coursework required for a Marriage and Family Counselor’s License. They take classes like “individual assessment,” “group dynamics” and “multicultural counseling.” These courses are aimed at mental health challenges focusing on the individual. Marriage counseling courses, when offered, are an elective.
When they take that individual-orientation training and apply it to a married couple who says “help, save marriage,” the model fails. Often the first thing the therapist will do is send the parties to individual counseling to deal with their personal mental health issues.
This can often drive a feuding couple further apart. As separate counselors reinforce individual needs and desires over the joint needs of the relationship, the marriage disintegrates further.
So, what can you do if you want to save your marriage? You know you need professional intervention to help you communicate better and work through existing relationship problems.
Perhaps the best person to help you is your pastor. Clergy have a vested interest in preserving marriage as a sacrament. hile many ministers will advise someone in an abusive situation to get out, their initial reaction is to help save marriage in general and yours in particular.
Pastoral counseling integrates psychological theory and biblical principles. The emotional and spiritual journey is seen as intertwined.
If you attend a church or place of worship regularly, you can contact the office and ask for an appointment for pastoral counseling to help save marriage.
If you don’t attend a church already, you can look for pastoral counseling at a local church. Churches tend to have an outreach to the community mission and most are open to providing services to all who ask.
Large churches, especially the so-called “megachurches” will have a special pastoral counseling staff. However, if you choose a smaller church, you will probably get attention from a senior pastor.
In either case, when you really want to help save marriage, turn to pastoral counseling rather than secular marriage counseling.
Traditional individually oriented therapy, when turned to marriage counseling, focuses on “communication skills” and “problem solving strategies.” Tackling marriage problems this way can actually stress the partners out more.
Biblically based counseling, on the other hand, can help you solve your problems in the way God intended.
If you are saying, “help, save marriage,” contact a pastor to get the real kind of marriage counseling you need.
Tags: Pastoral Counseling, save marriage, Secular Therapist
Posted by Men Secrets on Jan 16, 2009 in
Dating What to Know When Dating a Latina
Latin single women are some of the most sensual people in the world. Not only are Latinas beautiful, but they convey sensuality with their fluid movements. If you have met a Latin single woman who you would like to date, you may wonder what cultural differences there are that you should know about.
First of all, Latin single women have grown up in a large extended family. She may be closer to her third cousin twice removed than you are to your brother. Not only are nuclear families larger, but Hispanics often have grandparents, uncles, and nephews living with them.
Her family is going to be very important to her, and if the relationship is going to go anywhere, she will want their stamp of approval. You need to be prepared to spend a significant amount of time at family gatherings and extend your charm to members of the whole family.
More than likely, the Latin single women you meet will be overwhelmingly Catholic. Unlike white Catholics, Hispanics take the religion quite seriously, including the Vatican’s edicts on sex and contraception. This does not mean that your Latina lover won’t sleep with you. But it does mean that she will feel guilty about it.
If you are dating a Hispanic woman, you should consider going to church with her from time to time. It will give you a window into a belief system, not to mention please her enormously.
When you first meet Latin single women, you will be surprised at how physically affectionate they are. You shouldn’t misinterpret this as being open to sexual advances. Hispanic culture has different boundaries when it comes to hugging and kissing, but that doesn’t mean that she is ready to jump into bed with you.
One of the best dates you can take Latin single women out on is dinner and dancing. Dancing is very important in Hispanic culture and she will probably be very interested in all kinds of dance.
Another good date is a simple walk. Traditional courtship in many Latin American countries involves walking around the town circle with a potential suitor.
When you meet Latin single women, you may notice that they will make good wives. They are trained to put men’s needs first. They will also be likely to see you as a good catch as you are more attentive to their needs than Hispanic men typically are.
One caution though, when reading this article, you may get the sense that all Latin single women are the same. Not only are all individuals different, but there are many cultures within Latin American society. A third generation Latina will probably be more acculturated to American customs than someone who just immigrated here.
Further, Latin America is a big place – bigger than Europe in fact. Just as you wouldn’t think that someone from Britain was the same as someone from Poland or that women in Sweden and Spain were the same, you shouldn’t assume that Latin America is a monolithic culture.
When you want to meet Latin single women, you should get to know as much about their culture and their individual tastes as you can.
Tags: Dating Latin Single Women, Dating Latin Women
Posted by Men Secrets on Jan 16, 2009 in
Dating Do you need free dating women ideas? In fact, many of the most romantic dates you can take your lady out on won’t cost you a dime. This article will show you 10 free dating women options that give you not cost dates that will still impress the ladies.
What is one of a woman’s most persistent romantic fantasies? That would have to be a long walk on a moonlit beach. In personal ad after personal ad, you see this wish appear. So, why not make it a part of your free dating women repartee? She will be far more impressed than if you took her to a fancy French restaurant?
If you are doing a daytime date, consider going on a bike ride together. Ride for a while. Stop and have a picnic. Then ride home. The exercise will do you wonders and there’s a sense of having shared space without having to fill it with words.
Most towns have free concerts from time to time, but particularly in the summer months. These range from classical music played by symphonies to patriotic tunes by a military band, to popular music. A concert tells your date that you have a touch of class and in no way screams “cheap.”
Similarly, most museums have at least one evening a month designated as a free or donation only night. Take advantage of this and your date will think you have some culture.
Plan a picnic for your date. You don’t have to get imported Cheese or fancy wine either. But, do take the time to make the food special. Cut off the crusts on the bread or make a nice desert. Fruits such as strawberries are easy to pack and quite sexy at the same time.
Another free dating women idea is to volunteer to babysit a married couple’s children. Not only is it fun to play with the rug rats, it gives your date the idea that you could be good with kids in the future. This will make her think more romantically toward you.
Along the same lines, go “house shopping.” (Make sure you are only looking at homes well outside your means though so she doesn’t get any ideas.) Again, this has her thinking toward the future which may make you happy in the present.
There are also seasonal things that you can do that make good free dating women events. For instance, at Halloween, carve pumpkins. There is something very charming about carving funny faces in a gourd. You will probably have more fun doing this than you would if you spent money on a movie.
The next idea I have is also holiday related. Go out and look at Christmas lights. People spend a lot of time and money competing for the distinction of having the best holiday decorations outside their home. You can take advantage of this entertainment for free!
My final free dating woman tip is to build a large fire in your fireplace and read poetry to each other. If that doesn’t get her in the mood, nothing ever will.
Tags: Date Women Free
Posted by Men Secrets on Jan 15, 2009 in
Dating Shes In the Army Now – Dating Service Women
When you say “soldier” a picture of a fit and ready man comes to mind. But almost 15 percent of the U.S. armed forces are now women. So, in many cases, when you think about military personnel, a female soldier should come to mind. Because there now so many females in the military, there is an issue about dating service women.
Dating service women presents challenges that aren’t there when you are dating a civilian. She has obligations that her non-military sisters don’t have. For instance, she could suddenly be deployed to a war zone. She is also likely to be moved from base to base every couple of years. So dating service women means being prepared to follow their careers and support them when they need it.
If you are going to be dating service women, you need to know that although she is in a masculine profession (the military), she still wants to be treated like a lady. She’s “one of the boys” in her work life. She wants to be all female when she is with you.
You also need to invest time learning about the military in general and her specialty specifically. This means learning the acronyms that she spouts off at the drop of a hat. This is the way she communicates, and you need to be part of that.
You should also know something about military culture. Military law governs every aspect of a service woman’s life. No business can tell you that you can lose your job because of the person you date or put you in jail for something you did in your off hours. But, the military “owns” the enlisted person or officer. When dating service women, get to know the culture and the specific challenges they face.
There are times when you make plans with your girlfriend and she suddenly has to drop whatever it is you are doing and report to base. It doesn’t matter whether the event is really important to you. She has no choice in whether to go to your parent’s 50th wedding anniversary if she is called up on an emergency drill.
She will need you to keep her motivated. The military is still not a gender neutral place. If her career is important to her, you need to support her as she moves up the chain of command.
When dating a military woman, it is important that you support her decision to be part of the Armed Services. You may not agree with everything the military does, but she made the decision before she met you to be a part of serving her country. Unless she’s Chairman of the Joint Chiefs, she doesn’t have much control about military or foreign policy. Just as you wish she would be supportive of your work, you have to realize that her career is important to her.
There are many challenges in dating a service woman. But, when you fall in love with a military woman, you know a lot of things about her already. For instance, she fits into a larger organization. She’s physically fit. She pays attention to details. She is probably quite loyal and dependable. And, she knows what patriotism and love of country are. You could do a lot worse than dating service women.
Tags: Dating Service Women
Posted by Men Secrets on Jan 14, 2009 in
Relationships It can be difficult to show people how much they mean to you. Many of us go through life with strong feelings about the people in our lives but we never express those emotions clearly. Yet, having meaningful relationships actually requires that we know how to show our love and affection.
Learning How to Communicate With Your Partner
Showing your emotions can be easier when you give yourself permission to start sharing how you feel with the people around you.
You can start small – laughing when you want to laugh, hugging someone when you want to hug, or holding hands when you want to be close to the other person.
It’s a good idea to start slow in order to build a strong foundation built on trust and respect. Without building trust and respect, you can’t feel comfortable to share your love or deepest thoughts.
• If you didn’t grow up in a family where these skills were encouraged, give yourself some time to get used to communicating and emoting.
If you have practiced this first step but still have a hard time showing love and communicating confidently, you may want to consider trying positive affirmations about communication and relationships. Affirmations are statements you can use to change the way you think and behave.
Another way to look at it is that affirmations are positive statements that activate your mind to accomplish great things. If you tell yourself each day, “Communicating my feelings is important,” for example, you give yourself permission to communicate how you feel about others.
Another affirmation that gives you permission to show your love and affection for others is: “Communication is the master key that I use to open the door to happiness.”
• Words have power. You can harness the power of words to change your life and relationships in a positive manner.
You can learn how to show love and communicate with loved ones by actively using affirmations in your life. Affirmations can help you give yourself permission to share your feelings and love. This will allow you to experience much more fulfilling and positive relationships.
• Affirmations can also help you reprogram your mind with positive thoughts. Use these thoughts to focus on – and achieve – your goals and replace negative thoughts.
Even though affirmations take some practice and may take some time before you begin to feel the full effect, you can make drastic changes to your behavior by repeating affirmations that encapsulate your belief system. Repeat and reflect on them every day and you’ll soon notice a difference.
Yes! Affirmations really can make a difference in your life and the lives of others. How? Well, what you think affects how you feel, which affects what you do with your life. The more positive you think and feel about yourself and your relationships, the more positive events and situations you’ll experience in that relationship.
These changes will not only be obvious to you, but also to your friends and family. If you make these affirmations part of your daily life, you’ll find that expressing love and communicating your feelings will be easier. You’ll also be happy to discover that the love you express will be returned to you!
Posted by Men Secrets on Jan 14, 2009 in
Dating Fifteen percent of married ladies play the field. That means 45 million American females are available for an “on the side” relationship. What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of dating married women?
One of the first things that you will find when dating married women is that you’ll get some of the best sex in the world. Women willing to have an affair aren’t looking for love or romance. They want a physical outlet. Because they are committed to the sexual, not emotional, aspects of the relationship, you will probably find this is the best sex you’ll ever have.
There is also an element of secrecy when you are dating married women that adds a certain touch of spice to the relationship. Perhaps you will meet at a motel at lunchtime or go away for the weekend. However you meet, there will be an element of “getting away with it” that adds a certain luster to the event.
Further, because this relationship is about sex and the married woman you are dating is not free to really get involved with you, the relationship will not have the emotional entanglements that other types of dating relationships have. The woman will not expect you to get involved in the details or dramas of her life. In fact, the opposite is true. The more you know, the more she risks being found out. So, she is likely to keep your affair compartmentalized.
When you are dating married women, you will not have to invest a lot of money in the relationship. Aside from the costs of a cheap motel, you will not have the normal dating expenses. You can’t take her to a restaurant as she may be seen by someone she knows. And, you can’t buy her gifts and jewelry because her husband would be suspicious.
One final advantage to dating married women is that single women may find you more attractive. After all, if a married woman is willing to risk her marriage for you, you must be something special. You’ve got the whole “alpha male” thing working for you.
Of course, there are a few disadvantages in dating married women as well.
One is that your partner’s husband may find out about the affair. If this happens, there are a whole range of possibilities. He could insist that she end the affair abruptly. She could find herself facing divorce. And, in rare cases, husbands have been known to commit violence against their straying wives and their partners.
Another problem is that you fall in love with the woman with whom you are having the affair. If she is not in a position to leave her husband, you may end up heartbroken.
Finally, there is the moral dimension to consider. It is rare to see a woman for any length of time and not develop some emotional attachment to her. If you are dating married women, you run the risk of breaking up a family. What started as a casual affair might end up having lifelong consequences for your friend’s children.
When you meet a woman who wants to have an illicit affair, you have to consider the advantages and disadvantages to dating married women.
Tags: Dating Married Women
Posted by Men Secrets on Jan 13, 2009 in
Dating Dating beautiful women can be a challenge because men put them on a pedestal. Can you believe that she accepted a date with you?
Dating beautiful women is a real ego-booster to most men. They not only make you feel good about yourself, but they increase your status in the eyes of other men. Ironically, they also increase your desirability in the eyes of other women too!
Highly attractive women have a lot of opportunities to date rich, powerful, and attractive men. As a result, as a group, they tend to develop some bad habits that make them less desirable as long term partners. For instance, they are likely to be vain, high maintenance, and manipulative.
If you happen to be dating beautiful women and aren’t very wealthy or particularly attractive, you have some challenges to deal with.
Here’s some advice about how to handle dating beautiful women.
1.) Be different. When every man is fawning over a woman, they begin to look alike to her. You stand out by being different.
2.) Treat her badly. If every man is treating her like a goddess, there is nothing you can do to differentiate yourself. But if you ignore her, act unaffected by her good looks, and avoid looking lustful, she is likely to want to pursue you. You have become the guy who didn’t knock himself out for her – and that’s attractive to her.
3.) Ignore her. When you see a beautiful woman with her plain sidekick (and she will have one), focus in on her friend. The beautiful woman will get insanely jealous because she can’t stand any other female getting attention (hence, her plain friend) and she will begin to pursue you. This is how you start dating beautiful women.
4.) Tease her. Most men who want to date a particularly beautiful woman will suck up with complements. Instead, take the route of teasing her. Point out her flaws in a lighthearted way. That way, she’ll want to work to get you.
5.) See her as a complex woman. Most men dating beautiful women look at them as pretty packages. Go deeper. Talk about her hobbies and interests. Make her comfortable by talking about the things which engage her mind.
6.) Wait to call her. If you get her number, don’t call the next day. Wait a few days to call her. She expects you to be panting for her and will respect you more if you don’t seem desperate.
7.) Don’t push for sex. Okay, the ultimate reason for dating beautiful women is because you are sexually attracted to her. But, she knows that every guy is hot to get her into bed. But “playing hard to get,” you pique her interest in you.
Dating beautiful women is not for the faint of heart. But, even if you don’t have the wealth of Bill Gates or the power of Henry Kissinger, you may find that treating an extremely attractive woman with some distance may be the ultimate aphrodisiac.
Tags: Dating Beautiful Girls, Dating Beautiful Women